Looking back on 2020

December 21, 2020

I’ve written year reviews on my blog for a long time and I’m quite annoyed with myself for skipping it last year, I don’t really know why I did. This year though, it feels like a necessity to have some kind of record of 2020. It was the year that so much happened, but yet so little.

When I was looking through photos for this, there were a few months were we really didn’t do much at all. I’m also a bit annoyed with myself for not documenting more of the unusual moments in the past year - like wearing face masks, home schooling etc. I guess at the time it seemed mundane and un-photogenic, but now it feels like so much of what the last year looked like. Anyway, on to what I did photograph… let’s skip back to January 2020, just before our lives changed so much…

JANUARY

Heju’s gorgeous home which we featured in Volume 9 of 91 Magazine

The year started off quite fun. Myself and photographer Jemma Watts took a day trip over to Paris to shoot a gorgeous home for 91 Magazine. We had a lovely morning shooting the space and afterwards we did a bit of shopping before our train back. (We did run into some slightly scary street protests though, which wasn’t so fun!)

January saw another work-related trip, this time to Margate with my colleague Hannah. We were there on a recce for the 91 Mag event we were planning to run in the summer, which of course had to be cancelled. We had such a great day planned for June, working with these guys above and many others, so hopefully we will be able to reschedule this for 2021!

I also hosted the first of our online workshops in January, which was something I’d had in the pipeline for a while and turned out to be the perfect addition to the business for 2020, considering what was soon to happen. It made up for the absence of the in-person events as we were able to connect with and help lots of small business owners across the world. As well as attendees from all corners of the UK, we also welcomed people from across Europe and the US which was amazing.

FEBRUARY

When I was looking through photos I scrolled past a screenshot I’d taken on the 31st Jan which I guess I must’ve Whats App’ed to my other half - it was a BBC news update saying the first case of coronavirus had been identified in the UK. I guess that was the day it all officially kicked off here for us. It just took the government a bit of time to do anything about it, so February still felt relatively normal. These shots above are from one of the last visits I would make into London for the rest of the year. It honestly feels so strange to think of getting on a busy tube train or bustling round a museum now - something we all took for granted, but would soon give anything to be able to do.

In Feb, we also took our last mini break before the country went into lockdown a few weeks later. I remember at this point we were definitely talking about it more and were wondering what would happen, but we were still very much going about our lives as normal. I remember we stopped off in Bristol on our way home from Wales and met some family for a cosy lunch on a tiny restaurant table and I popped in this mini plant shop - again all things that became impossible to do as time moved on.

One thing I got into doing at home and continued throughout the spring and summer, was propagating plants. I’ve spent a lot of money on plants over the last few years, but finally felt I had enough knowledge to give propagation a go. Although out of these six specimens here, I think only two of them have managed to survive! It’s all a learning curve and I did have more success later in the year!

MARCH

Getting Volume 9 of 91 Magazine out in lockdown

March is when the world was turned upside down. But it wasn’t til towards the end of the month that the UK actually went into a full lockdown, so for some reason we thought we could make a start on our bathroom renovation! We’d had quotes, so we decided to make a start on ripping out the old one. Thankfully, we left the essentials in place, as the bathroom is still looking pretty much like it does in the above photo!

Like so many other parents around the world, we suddenly became teachers for the next few months, which was tricky on one level but interesting on another. We discovered more about our daughter and where her strengths and weaknesses lie, and we had the chance to teach her things that we feel are important that might not necessarily be covered in the curriculum. Of course, the battle was both of us trying to continue with our work minus childcare, and for a while I was terrified that our printers would have to close, and I wouldn’t be able to get the new issue of 91 Magazine printed.

APRIL, MAY & JUNE (Lockdown 1.0)

lots of lockdown walks in the countryside

Thankfully, my printers stayed open and we got 91 off to print on schedule. I didn’t have my usual team help with packing all our pre-orders and subscriptions though, so I had to enlist the help of the immediate family! Another home-schooling lesson - sometimes when you run your own business, you have to do the not-so-fun jobs too!

The rest of our April reads like a huge lockdown cliché! We went on daily walks in our local area, we did lots of crafty things like flower-pressing and of course we got really into jigsaws! We had lunch together in the garden every day and again, like so many others across the country we cracked on with some DIY - painting quite a lot of our uPVC windows and doing a bit of upcycling too!

It’s heartbreaking knowing so many people have had really difficult experiences due to the pandemic, from redundancy to loneliness to losing loved ones. Sometimes it hard to bear the suffering that this horrible virus has brought to so many. This year has definitely made me so grateful for all I have, and I can honestly say I feel different because of it. We were so lucky we were both able to continue working and that we have plenty of space and a garden to enjoy. I don’t think I even experienced any boredom throughout as I can always find something to do between working, home-schooling, housework etc. While it hasn’t been an easy year by any means, I will look back on these months in lockdown with a strange kind of fondness, where we got to spend so much time together as a family, really appreciating and supporting each other in every way we could. I think our daily lunches in the garden all together must be one of my best memories - when do you ever get to do that?! We probably never will again either!

JULY

Gorgeous independent shop Frank in Whitstable

As much as I am happy pottering around at home, July did feel like a breath of fresh air; being able to get out in the world again and do some relatively normal things! We were able to celebrate Ruby’s birthday with a small kids party and my folks were even able to visit from Northern Ireland. Once the school term finished, we started taking little day trips to the coast, visiting Whitstable and Deal, and what wonderful weather we had too. It was so nice to be able to see friends again and we spent an afternoon with some wandering around the lavender fields near us. We also continued with some of the DIY in the house - painting the inside of the patio doors and we tiled underneath the windows to add some colour. We finally got a new dining table too, so this space started to feel much nicer. I still need to paint the struts on the glass ceiling…. a job for 2021!

AUGUST

Camping again - this time in windy Wales!

August was a great month. One of the things we had started to do during the lockdown was grow things from seed. Then in August I built a raised bed in the garden and planted out lots of things we’d grown - basil, tomatoes, chillies, sunflowers, nasturtiums and carrots. The basil & sunflowers did brilliantly, but I think I need a bit more practice with the rest as you’ll see in next month’s pics! I think we sowed the seeds a bit late really.

It was so lovely to be able to take some time away from home, and unbelievably I was finally convinced to give camping a go! We did two trips - one with family and friends in Sussex and one to Wales, just the three of us. I think the photos of Ruby with all her cousins and friends lined up holding hands is one of my favourite photos from this year. They had the best time together even though it was SUPER hot the week we were there! Our trip to Wales was a bit more stormy, but it was still fun and we stopped off in Cheltenham for a night and also managed a trip to Daylesford Organic which is just gorgeous. This is why I love looking back on the year - especially this year - as it is a reminder that there were good times amongst the tougher times, and I’m so happy that the summer months allowed this.

SEPTEMBER

getting the next issue of 91 ready to print

Volume 10 of 91 Magazine - created in lockdown

September certainly brought about a sense of normality as the schools returned, although remember those first couple of weeks when every kid in the country caught a cold and every parent rushed to get them a Covid test and there was barely one to be found?! It was nice to be back in a normal work routine though, and we got the second edition of 91 off to the printers.

Lots was happening in the garden, our sunflowers looked amazing (although some of them of them decided they’d face over the neighbours fence instead of into our garden!) Our carrots were disappointing, but perhaps I just pulled them to early?! Growing things is such a learning curve and I’m looking forward to having another crack at it in 2021.

Ruby desperately wanted a hamster, which I succumbed to. And while I knew I’d be the one who ended up cleaning it’s cage every week, she has actually stayed pretty engaged with it. Even though we’ve had a cat since before she was born, it’s nice for her to have a pet that is hers.

OCTOBER

In early October, I turned 39! I honestly can’t believe I’m nearly 40 sometimes. I’m desperately trying to turn my mindset around for the big birthday next year and be excited about it. So many women have told me their 40s are the best and I’m really trying to look at getting older with a different perspective. If we can, I’d love a nice holiday somewhere to celebrate. (hint, hint!)

At the October half term, we were due to go to Wales and Herefordshire for a few nights, but Wales had just went into another lockdown so that part was cancelled. We did go to Herefordshire and stayed in a cute little cottage and it was so nice to have a change of scenery, even just for two nights. Disappointment and cancelled plans have been a recurring theme this year, but with each one, we did our best to appreciate the reasons and simply make the most of what we could do.

No trick or treating this Halloween (which to be honest, I didn’t mind!) instead we painted pumpkins, make yarn ghosts and made some quite successful cat ears!

NOVEMBER (LOCKDOWN 2.0)

The lack of photos from November is a tell tale sign that we went back into a lockdown this month. Not a lot was happening other than work and school. We did a huge clear out in the house though - we got a couple of Hippo bags - have you ever used them?! Like a skip but a giant bag that you fill and they come and collect. They were great and it was so cathartic to clear lots of stuff from the garden and the house. I spent a day tidying and organising my office too which felt great.

As the month came to a close, there was nothing for it but to start getting festive. We gradually introduce some Christmas decor and even got our tree the last week of November! I’ve always enjoyed the build up to Christmas more than the day itself - making decorations and baking festive treats, watching Christmas movies, and enjoying Christmas outings (usually). For me, it’s all about creating memories and mini traditions, rather than just focusing on this one day and getting presents. I think this really helped me deal with what was coming up in December and reduced the disappointment about the situation.

DECEMBER

As I write this, the country has just found out that the relaxing of Covid rules for Christmas has been scrapped and in our area, we are again pretty much in lockdown for the foreseeable future. It’s been super upsetting for so many who had made plans and I totally get how hard this has been. But for us, what this year has taught us, is to be grateful and at peace with what you have. I’m so thankful of how lucky we are and the fact that we get to spend a cosy little Christmas just the three of us is absolutely fine in our eyes. Of course we’d love to see our family and friends, but when the choice is between waiting a few more months when things are safe again and potentially risking more people’s lives, the decision is easy for us. All you can do is make the most of the situation make it as special as you can, and not constantly look for the negatives that this horrible pandemic has dealt us.

My mind constantly returns to those who have suffered directly at the hands of this virus, either losing a loved one, being left with the debilitating effects of Long Covid, and those who have sacrificed so much to care for those affected. Having a smaller, slower Christmas is a small price to pay. As a family we are totally happy in our little bubble and look forward to the days (hopefully in a few months) when we can embrace our loved ones with no worries and share and create memories with them again. But for now, we are making the most of every moment we get to spend with our daughter, knowing that this too shall pass.

I also had a mini celebration this month after finding out I’ve been shortlisted for Editor of the Year (Homes and Interiors) in the British Society of Magazine Editors awards! This is so exciting for me, as while I’ve won a couple of awards for our blog before, this is the first time the magazine (and me!) have been up for an award. The selection process and final decision is made by peers in the industry which makes it feel even more special, as being recognised by others in the magazine world means SO much. The winner will be announced in February, so I will keep you posted!

As we hurtle towards the end of one of most difficult and strange years in living memory, I am taking stock and considering what this experience has taught us. For sure it has become clear that nature is bigger and more powerful than us. As a species we could be wiped out quite easily and the world would keep on turning, and would probably thrive without us to destroy it. Life is a journey, and we should learn from this year what is truly important. For me, being kind is one of the biggest take-aways. Being kind to our planet and the animals that inhabit it (lets not forget that the exploitation of animals is what got us here). Being kind to our fellow humans and being kind to ourselves is all that really matters. As we enter 2021 and the continuing challenges we face, lets try to support one another, not judge others and simply enjoy the small things that make life worthwhile.

Happy Christmas everyone, wishing you well for the year ahead.

Caroline xxx

A 2018 review & a new blog perspective

January 18, 2019

We are only just over two weeks into the new year and I already feel like I am a bit late with this post. It is a constant battle to stay on top of everything, and while I love writing here, I’ve found I’ve had to succumb to prioritisation, and the tasks that help to bring in the cash are what need to come first.

The past few months, I’ve even toyed with the idea of closing this blog, but every time I think of it, it makes me feel sad. This is where my creative journey began, I feel like it is almost a part of me. My life, interests and style have evolved over the past 10 years since I started blogging, but that’s ok, and I’ve decided that it’s also ok to just check in here when I can, wherever I’ve got something to share, without feeling the pressure to make it a business.

91 Magazine has very much become my main focus business-wise, so I feel happy to let Patchwork Harmony be here, quietly in the background. Always there when I’ve got something to share, like an old friend who doesn’t mind that you haven’t called for a while, and who accepts you however much you’ve changed over the years.

The blog has changed too over the years, I guess reflecting me and my life - I feel like it has slowly evolved into more of a personal lifestyle blog rather than solely interiors. I will of course continue to share our own renovations and home projects, but the topics I am feeling the urge to write about here are more focused around general life as well as my passion for creative and independent business. I see this blog more as a platform to share my thoughts on things I feel strongly about rather than trying to ‘make a living as a blogger’. I wrote a post last year reflecting on ten years in blogging and how the industry has changed, which I think is what has led me to change my perspective on my blog.

So, looking ahead to 2019, I am going to simply go with it. If I write here - great - if I don’t, I’m not going to beat myself up about it. There’s only so much one woman can do, but I do hope to pop in here now and again with posts that will hopefully be inspirational and/or thought-provoking.

I’ve written these ‘year in pics’ posts for as long as I can remember, not minding if no-one gives a stuff about my year, but because it is simply something I enjoy doing for me. I love to look back and recall the things I’ve done with my family, or the achievements I’ve made in my career - it is a mini celebration of what has passed over the last 12 months. Yes, not every day or month has been rosy, but rather than dwell on the bad, these posts give me the chance to reflect on the good things, and feel gratitude for life’s journey, which otherwise can seem to hurtle by in a heart beat.

Even if you aren’t a blogger, I really recommend you take some time to look back on your year and maybe jot down a few of the lovely things that you’ve done. I find Instagram and the photos on your phone are good places to refer to when reminding yourself of events. Here’s how my 2018 looked….

the gorgeous From Victoria shop in Lewes

end of the day drinks in a super edgy Mexico City bar

Jan-Mar

The year kicked off in a super busy fashion - I was either at home - working, decorating or planning our kitchen renovation - or I was travelling. Actually, I fitted in quite a bit of travelling in the first three months of the year! We decided to make a bit of an effort as a family to take more day trips, so we visited Margate in January and Lewes in February - both towns I love for their independent vibe.

At the end of February I popped to Bordeaux with my friend and 91 colleague Jemma to shoot a home tour for the magazine. Then at the start of March, I got an amazing opportunity to travel to Mexico City as a media partner at a design fair there. That was definitely a highlight of my year. If you had’ve told me last Christmas I would go to Mexico in a couple of months, I would never have believed it! It is such a cool city, rich in culture as well as hip and edgy, with loads of great shops, cafes and restaurants to explore. I wrote a guide to the city if you are thinking of visiting.

Straight after arriving home from there, we went back to my homeland of Northern Ireland to celebrate my dad’s 70th birthday. And bam! the first quarter of the year was done!

The glorious UK summer of 2018! Beach time on the Isle of Wight.

One of my fave shops ever - Rust Jewellery in Yarmouth

Apr-Jun

April is always a busy month for me as the magazine is published, but once the majority of the work for that was out of the way, we took ourselves off on another little trip! This time, we headed up to Wales, where we’d be invited to stay at this lovely place. I’d never been to Wales before - I really loved it, and got to visit a shop I’ve been wanting to go to for literally years - Baileys Home & Garden - although they have a no photo policy (which I find quite strange in this day and age) so no pics from there. We did discover some other lovely shops - more about them in this post.

Back in London, we were basking in a pretty glorious summer, and I fondly remember a lovely day at the Green Rooms Market which I also wrote about here. I remember I took Ruby in her buggy which must have been one of the last times I used it, as it now seems so funny to imagine her riding in a buggy -she is so grown up these days!

Writing this, I’m realising how much we got away this year! At the end of May we made our annual trip to the Dordogne to see family, visiting the flea markets plus eating and drinking a lot. I took one of my fave pics of Ruby and her dad here too, it’s still my screensaver on my phone now!

We did a day trip to Hastings to photograph some of the fab indie shops there for the 91 blog, and we rounded off June by celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary on the Isle of Wight. At our wedding, our celebrant gave us a wooden box with a bottle of wine and some letters she’d told us to write to each other - not to be opened until our 5th anniversary. We sat outside our little cabin in the warm evening sun, drinking the wine and reading what our ‘about-to-be-married’ selves had written. Such a lovely thing to have - I laughed and cried a lot! ; )

Running creative business workshops was a new thing for me this year!

day tripping near home - Hornimann Museum

Facing my public speaking fears in another workshop

the sixth print issue of 91 Magazine going to print

Jul-Sept

The hot summer continued, and I won’t forget the workshop we ran at The West Collective fair at the start of July - it was SO hot! It was a great event- as well as the workshop, we also sold the magazine alongside lots of other lovely indie makers - but England were playing in the World Cup, and it seemed everyone would rather be outside with a cold beer than shopping inside!

After all the travelling we did earlier in the year, we stayed put for most of the summer months, finishing off the kitchen makeover and getting other bits done in the house, like tiling the hallway. Ruby turned four in the summer, we had celebrations and days out with her, enjoying the amazing weather and making the most of our time before she started school in September. We adjusted to a new schedule of school runs and her having her own little life which felt like quite a big step in the world of parenting.

I rounded off the summer with another workshop for creative business owners while frantically trying to get the next issue of the magazine ready to go to print!

the final creative business workshop of the year at Winter’s Moon in Chichester

Interviewing some inspiring female business owners in Paris (Photo: Jemma Watts)

Oct-Dec

As autumn rolled in, it seemed the travel bug reappeared! We had a child-free weekend away in Somerset for my birthday, visiting Bruton for an afternoon and then staying in Frome for a night and going to the Frome Independent Market on the Sunday. I can’t recommend this highly enough, especially if you are a fan of independent shops and brands, I loved it so much!

For Ruby’s first half term holiday we whisked her away for her first city break. We went Oslo, which, wow - it was cold! We stayed in a ‘too-good-to-be-true’ Airbnb, and spent our days cafe-hopping to warm up in between exploring the city. I really enjoyed it, although it probably wasn’t my favourite ever city. I can’t quite put my finger on why, perhaps because we went to Copenhagen the year before, which I LOVED.

In November, I ran another workshop with my colleague Jemma. This was our first longer session, where we added in some practical exercises for attendees, and it was such a great day. I’m hoping we will fit a few more of these in this year!

We did a speedy day trip over to Paris to shoot of a shop for the upcoming issue of 91, and I popped down to Lewes to hatch plans for our first creative day event! It’s been a great year developing the magazine and the 91 brand - adding the workshops and events. I’ve got a few other ideas brewing for 2019, so I’m excited to get cracking on those too! The year ended with a quiet Christmas at home with a chance to recuperate from a busy few months and take stock on the past year and plan for the next.

I hope to catch up with you again here soon! Let’s see where 2019 takes us! You can follow me on Instagram for more regular posts both at @patchworkhrmy and @91magazine.

Caroline x

Living & shopping consciously with kids

August 10, 2018

Recently, I've been thinking a lot about the idea of being more considered in what we bring into our home in regards to our daughter and how to minimise ‘kids clutter.’

The first reason this has been on my mind is I was commissioned to write a feature for In The Moment magazine about living minimally with kids, which gave me the chance to think about this idea deeply, as well as speak to some other interior-loving mums who are totally winning at this concept.

Secondly, our living room was featured on houzz.com back in June, where they focussed on the play area I created for Ruby. To my surprise, there were a number of critical comments posted by readers, that Houzz have since deleted (they appreciate constructive criticism but not mean or rude comments), which raised some questions for me. Not so much about how we decorate a child’s space, but how we manage the amassment of toys and games and whether it is really necessary for children to have a ridiculous amount of toys in the first place.

The comments that the Houzz post received didn’t offend me. In fact, I find it kinda laughable that people can make specific judgements about you, your home and life from a series of pictures online, and then pass comment on it. (side note: I plan to write a future post on dealing with the negativity that sharing your home online can sometimes create.) The comments were mainly directed at the fact they thought the space did not look conducive with a child’s development through play and implied that it looked like it was created for the gratification of the adult rather than the child.

The point about judgement is that people seem to assume that the space looks like this 24/7. Of course it doesn’t! But, I’m pretty sure Houzz would not have wanted to feature the space if I’d photographed it scattered with Lego and My Little Ponies! Yet, at the same time, I do try to keep some level of organisation due to the fact that a) it is our living room after all and b) I don’t think it’s conducive with a child’s play to have absolute chaos in their space. One of the values I am trying to instil in Ruby as she grows up is to have respect for our home and for her possessions. I encourage her to tidy things away when she is finished with them and to be considered in how she treats her belongings, as well as our furniture, walls etc.

The remarks that some commenters made were implying that it was unrealistic and we’d clearly hidden our child’s clutter in another room, and that most people who have children accept that their home is taken over by toys once kids come along. These observations got me thinking about why our society feels children in the first world need to possess a gargantuan amount of brightly coloured plastic to be happy and to develop and learn. My experience is that Ruby is just as happy with a cardboard box or a load of ingredients from the kitchen cupboard as she is with Disney Princess dolls. And to be quite honest, what she learns from mixing up herbs and spices at the kitchen table is preferential to the influence of unrealistic female representations.

Unfortunately, even at the age of four she already seems to have the insatiable desire for ‘new’. This is something I touched on in my article for In The Moment (which is in issue 15, currently on sale) and that my current battle is to try and minimise this need and teach her about quality over quantity. I realise that most kids her age probably have this character trait, but I do feel it’s something I want to tackle with her now, as the importance of over-consumption is so high on our priority lists right now. Not only does it put strain on my bank balance, but giving in to your child’s constant demands for new things that will inevitably be forgotten about a day or two later, is not helping them to learn about the value of money or the environmental problems our society is currently facing.

I should probably disclose at this point that I also love to shop. Yes, I know, you’re thinking ‘You're one to talk then’, but again, this is something I have been working on myself, and over the last year or so I have been focussing on only buying things I really need or truly love, and as much as possible are from independent shops and makers. Having beautiful things around me is something that brings me joy, so I don’t believe we need to completely deprive ourselves, but the point is with children, their choices are not thought through, they are simply dazzled by advertising, bright colours and newness.

shopping independently for children's toys

So, what conclusions have I drawn and what steps do I plan to take moving forward? Here are a few things I hope to maintain which you might also find useful if you are trying to cut back on the kiddie clutter:

- Do regular decluttering sessions and take unwanted items to the charity shop or sell at a car boot. I recently did one of these and even got Ruby involved. I explained how many of the toys she had were for two year olds, and as a ‘big four year old’ she agreed she no longer needed them, and she happily filled up the bag for the charity shop.

- Continue to instil values of environmental respect in our child. We already tell her that plastic hurts the sea creatures which horrifies her (especially as a big fan of Octonauts!) We either try to buy toys & games from charity shops or if we are buying any new items I try to steer her towards non-plastic items and/or things that she will definitely get value out of rather than it ending up at the bottom of the toy basket.

- She loves to read, and has quite the collection of books which is so great, and I must admit I find it hard to hold back on buying her lovely new books. But, as she grows out of certain ones, I will donate these either to younger cousins, charity shops, the local library or her nursery or school.

- promote learning and play through activities such as crafting, baking, activity books and going on regular outings.

One of the anomalies in this approach is Christmas and birthdays. While we aim to be restrained and considered in our gift giving we cannot dictate what other people give her. Luckily our close family and friends generally ask what they should get her, but of course it’s not really accepted to write ‘no plastic crap’ on party invites to her school friends! There’s not really a lot can be done on that front I guess (any suggestions?!) so I guess for now, we only have to deal with that once or twice a year.

I’m not going to lie, this is not an easy task, children are often (always?!) difficult to reason with and bribery is a regularly deployed tactic, but I do feel like this is an important issue not only for my own clutter battles, but for the sake of our planet. I’d love to hear about your experiences and if you are trying to manage the kiddie clutter and over consumption? I’ve only been doing this parenting thing for four years so any other tips you might have would be wholeheartedly welcomed!

good quality toys, games and books for children

To finish, here are a few options for shopping more consciously for kids – independent sellers who sell wooden and handcrafted toys, beautiful books and decorative objects:

Sarah and Bendrix – wooden toys, handmade soft toys, gorgeous books and décor

Olli Ella – creative play and decorative items

Smallable – French brand with huge range of good quality toys, clothes and décor items.

The Modern Nursery – Good range of wooden toys, focus on babies and pre-schoolers.

Anorak & Dot magazines – Lovely magazines for kids as alternative to the mainstream

Nurturing yourself through motherhood

February 16, 2018

With Mother’s Day just around the corner it’s got me thinking about what I’ve learnt over the last nearly 4 years since I became a mum. In short, the answer is – a LOT. A lot about myself, a lot about patience and tolerance, a lot about juggling family with career and a lot about balancing my child’s needs with my own.

When you bring a child into the world, or become a foster or adoptive parent, it is the probably one of the most life-changing experiences we can go through. I assumed, and I’ve heard so many expectant parents say the same, that the baby would just fit in around our life. Ha! How foolish! A baby, at least for the first year of its life, consumes you. Their welfare and needs are at the forefront of your mind every sleep-deprived moment of the day, as it should be, absolutely – but often at the determent of your own well-being and health.

At nearly four years in to my motherhood journey, of course my daughter’s needs are still at the forefront, but I have slowly realised that being fulfilled and nourished (both nutritionally and mentally) in yourself is hugely important to your happiness but also to that of the people around you. If you’ve found yourself arguing or feeling resentful towards your partner, it is more than likely down to the fact you are not allowing yourself enough of what makes you feel energised, inspired and happy. Yes, children bring happiness and joy in abundance, but so do many other things. Allowing yourself to enjoy those things does not mean you are any less of a great mother by focusing on yourself, even for a short time.

Pink cushion, £19.50; Grey pom pom throw, £69; Serving board, £25 all Marks and Spencer

In the spirit of appreciating mothers (we should do it EVERY day, not just once a year, right?!) I thought I’d share a few thoughts on how to nurture yourself in motherhood. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this too – what do you do to treat yourself? How do you ensure you keep your mind and body healthy when carrying out the hardest job in the world? Do let me know. Here are the things I've found helpful or I am currently working to improve on myself...

1. Let go of the ‘mum guilt’ – We’ve all experienced it - guilt about putting your little one into nursery so you can go back to work, guilt because you fancy a night out, guilt because you lost your patience and shouted. In our modern world it seems like there is SO much pressure to be the perfect mum and do everything, but you just gotta let it go. NO-ONE is perfect, and you are doing a great job so you have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. Instead, feel proud that you enjoy work as well as motherhood, enjoy the fact you have friends and a social life and feel fine with how you instil discipline, safe in the knowledge that you balance this with masses of love, affection and fun.

Scented Spring Posy, £25 from Marks and Spencer

2. Take time out – Time to yourself can sometimes be rare when you are a mum, but it is SO important. Don’t feel like this can only be a ‘once every six months’ occurrence. Plan ahead for those days or evenings out – and then go book yourself a creative workshop, meet a friend for drinks or go get a massage. When you’re at home, spend an evening with your favourite magazine and some cake, take up a craft which you can do a bit of every evening, or why not just do a bit of faffing?! I love faffing around with styling things in the house, or playing around arranging some flowers – those times when you aren’t really doing anything particularly useful but it allows your mind to wander and relax.

Lombard dinner plate, £5, Marks and Spencer

3. Eat well – I am totally guilty of not doing this one myself. I think about what Ruby is eating and constantly encourage her to eat her fruit and vegetables, but then eat badly myself. It’s something I really want to work on this year – firstly because if she sees me eating good things then hopefully she will follow suit, and also I’m sure if I am looking after myself nutritionally then I will feel less tired and run-down too. Rather than just wolfing down some toast for lunch, I want to try and throw together a salad or a wrap and substitute those biscuits with fruit. Generally, I think achieving this comes down to planning. Make sure to throw a few bits in the shopping trolley for yourself rather than only thinking of the kids meals. Meal planning can go a long way to ensuring you don’t just grab a quick ready meal on the way home, so try and draw up even a rough guide at the start of week.

4. Streamline your life – I’ve been reading The Empowered Mama, and I really enjoyed the bit about pruning your life. There’s a quote in it which says: ‘When we become skilled at selectively knowing what to prune out of our lives, what remains becomes stronger, brighter, clearer.’ Sometimes it’s people you need to prune – if there is a friend or colleague who demands too much of you, and makes you feel drained, or takes up time you could be doing something you love, then maybe it’s time to step away from that relationship. Sometimes it is ‘stuff’ you need to prune – clutter can become suppressing, so take a bit of time to evaluate whether you really wear all those clothes in your wardrobe (there are loads of great blog posts out there about creating a capsule wardrobe) or simply take half an hour and clear out a couple of drawers. It took me ten minutes the other day to go through my underwear drawer and throw out anything that was past it and I felt strangely lighter afterwards knowing that everything in that drawer was now useable. Or it may be activities that can be pruned – if you are the type of person who finds it hard to say no, you may have ended up with duties or plans that you’d really rather not do. Also, check with your kids if they genuinely enjoy all of their activities – you may find they’d rather not take that piano lesson as well as singing in a choir. Make sure you are all only doing things that actually bring you happiness and fulfilment.

5. Exercise – It’s easy to say that it is hard to fit exercise into your life, but I’ve recently realised that you don’t need to attend a two hour fitness class or go on a six mile bike ride to introduce exercise into your life. Obviously if you are on a mission to get fit or loose weight then by all means, but I’ve found that introducing just a small amount of gentle exercise can make such a difference. I’ve never been one for exercise classes, but I quite enjoy yoga, so I’ve started following ‘Yoga with Adrienne’ on YouTube and doing half hour videos a couple of times a week in my front room. I always do it in the morning and always feel really good after it and like it was a positive start to the day. I’m also trying to incorporate at least one brisk walk into my week when I listen to a podcast and keep up a good pace. You can also burn a few extra cals simply by having a run around the park with the kids or putting some music on and dancing round the living room with them!

Serving board, as before. Food by Marks and Spencer

6. Treat yourself – Mother’s Day is just around the corner, so fingers crossed a treat is on it’s way (!), but regardless, there’s no harm in giving yourself an extra little treat is there?! I find it is a real pick-me-up to surround yourself with pretty things at home – flowers, plants, candles, favourite books and magazines, a really cosy blanket – then simply put your feet up and remember you are doing fabulous!

I really hope you feel appreciated this Mother's Day and ALL the time! And don't forgot about your own mum - she knows how tough motherhood can be, only too well! Do let me know any thoughts you have on this post - I am far from a mummy/parenting blogger and am not attempting to be, but as it's such a big part of my life, I think it's nice to go there now and again.

** This post was sponsored by Marks and Spencer to celebrate Mother's Day and to highlight their Flower Shop where you can treat your mum or yourself to a beautiful bouquet. If you fancy a little bit of floral faffing like me, it's worth checking out some tips they've put together on flower arranging. M&S provided me with some product and flowers for my images. **

my year in pics 2017

January 3, 2018

So it turns out I took an unintentional blog break for most of December. Life took over with lots of work to finish up before Christmas and I also seem to have been experiencing a bit of a lull in creativity and motivation. I'm putting that down to the weather and the lack of light, which seems to result in me barely picking up my camera for weeks on end, and instead opting for a cosy blanket, a glass of wine and Netflix! But hey, 2018 is here, the nights will be getting lighter soon, and going through my pictures from the last year has started to reignite my creative spirit! 2017 was a slightly challenging year for me in many ways, but lots of great things happened too, so here is a little run through of how the year panned out at Patchwork Harmony HQ!

We actually saw out 2016 with the exciting news that I was expecting our second baby. But sadly, less than two weeks after finding out, I was in hospital having surgery to remove one fallopian tube and the embryo that was developing there. I never ever contemplated having an ectopic pregnancy, I thought it was such a rare condition, and while I dealt with it well at the time, over the year it's often left me feeling reflective and sad about what could have been, particularly as falling pregnant again hasn't happened so easily. (if you want to read more about what happened you can in this post) In the weeks of my recovery I also had to deal with the news that the company I had been working for on a freelance but permanent basis could no longer afford to keep me on, so this meant facing the year with not only the loss of the baby but the loss of a substantial amount of income.

It wasn't all doom and gloom though, and I felt so lucky that we had managed to get moved into our new house beforehand, and family were helping out to get the place into shape. I wrote a separate post about what we've done to the house in our first year here if you fancy a peek. There's still lots to do but I'm chuffed we've done as much as we have so far.

91 Magazine behind the scenes photoshoot

Once i was back on my feet, I got back to work on 91 Magazine, and had a few trips lined up - firstly Belfast to visit family and do a photoshoot for the magazine, and then in April I got to go to Milan with some fellow bloggers with DFS to the Salone del Mobile furniture fair. You can check out the post I wrote about to see if the trends we spotted have took hold in the interiors world!

Blogging really can bring some fab opportunities such as the trip to Milan, and this year I also got invited along to Chelsea Flower Show by Marks and Spencer. I didn't get to spend long at the show as I had to rush back to pick Ruby up, but it was so fun to see, and I really enjoyed the second part of the collaboration - styling my home with Marks and Spencer's flowers! If you're a flower fan do take a peek!

The third print issue of 91 Magazine published in May, and this was our first one that was sold in WH Smith travel stores. It was quite a surreal experience to see my little baby nestled next to the likes of Elle Deco and Living Etc on the shelves of a London train station shop!

Thankfully freelance work started to pick up too and I was asked to write the Living column for new magazine In The Moment. It's a lovely lifestyle magazine focussing on well being and creative living. If you haven't checked it out do have a look. It's my first time ever writing a column so I'd love to hear what you think! ;)

In June, we took a much needed week away in France, relaxing by the pool and of course a flea market visit or two! And in July, we celebrated Ruby's 3rd birthday! Looking back at photos of her from the last year I've realised just how much she has grown up in the past twelve months - it's incredible. Her thoughtful and caring nature and sunny disposition make her a joy to be around, I'm such a proud mama!

At the end of July we took a bit of an impromptu trip to Bristol. I'd never been before, and as I suspected, I really loved the city. If you haven't been, do take a look at my post about some great shops to visit. It's also a bit of a review of my new camera - the Olympus Pen E-PL8.

September brought another impromptu trip away when I was invited to stay at the fabulous Barford Beach House in Cornwall. It really was the most spectacular house I've ever stayed in - floor to ceiling windows in every room with sea views and the decor was fab - lots of interesting vintage finds and luxury touches - like the brass roll top bath! Do have a read of the post I wrote over on the 91 Magazine blog.

I took part in a lovely event in North London selling 91 Magazine amongst a fantastic group of independent businesses at the Occasional Home Store. It was so lovely to get out and meet some of the sellers who often advertise in the magazine and to meet some of our readers. See who else was selling at the event in this post and also keep your eyes peeled for more of these events in 2018, they are definitely a must visit for interior lovers!

One of the highlights of my year was definitely our trip to Copenhagen. It really is a fabulous city. The shopping and food was amazing, in fact I wrote two blog posts about it! If you want to find out my top spots to visit, then check out this one over on the 91 blog and this one.

Amara blog award - Best Interior Magazine

If that trip was a personal highlight, then winning an Amara blog award is my professional highlight of the year! Myself and the team were over the moon to be awarded Best Interior Magazine blog amongst a strong category of mainstream magazines. We were thrilled that the indie magazine market is being recognised in this way. October also saw the AW17 issue of 91 hit the shelves, and it's been the fastest selling issue yet! I'm so happy that more and more people are hearing of us and enjoying what we are creating.

I also added a new product to the 91 range with our free quarterly e-zine. If you haven't seen this yet, then you just need to sign up to the mailing list as it is exclusive to these subscribers. It is a free mini digital magazine that comes out in between when the print issues are out, for an extra little dose of 91 loveliness! It's proving a popular little coffee break read! You can register here if you'd like to receive it. You can still get the current one when you register, and the next one comes out in Feb.

The rest of the year was taken up by school open days (because unbelievably Ruby is starting school this Sept!!) and trying to complete work deadlines before we headed to France for Christmas. And there we are! 2018 rolled right in! While it wasn't the best start to the year, 2017 did get better and we've made some lovely memories with many highlights along the way.

If you made it this far, well done! I tend to do this annual post as my own little recap and reflection of the past twelve months, so it's a bonus if anyone else is interested in reading it!

Finally, I'm keen to keep writing posts on here that my readers really want to see - I'd love to hear what you enjoy seeing here. Is it mainly our home renovations? Or would you like to see other home tours? Are you interested in the Editor's Life posts? Would you like to see more lifestyle/family related posts? Any comments you have I'd really love to know so I can tailor the content.

Happy New Year peeps, here's to a creative, productive and happy 2018!

Caroline x

Creating new Christmas rituals

November 14, 2017

I recently read a column in Smallish magazine about Christmas which really resonated with me. The writer talked about how having children makes you become nostalgic about your own childhood Christmas's, and what traditions your family had surrounding the big day. We never were a family to go away at Christmas, so my memories of it are very much rooted at home, Christmas films on the telly, fire roaring, while we ripped into our gifts. Slightly strangely, every Christmas Eve our family went for a Chinese meal - I'm guessing it was a combination of my mum saving her cooking energy for the next day and that the Chinese was probably one of the only restaurants open on the 24th back then, but hey, it's what we did and I always looked forward it!

Now that I am a parent myself, I've realised that it is now our turn to create those rituals and traditions for Ruby. She is 3 now, and most definitely understands the concept of Christmas. She is already talking about it and getting excited. The build up to the big day is all part of it, and especially Christmas Eve when the anticipation is off the scale! So while I know some traditions happen naturally and develop over the years (like our Chinese meals!), these are a few of the simple rituals I plan to do with her this year and beyond, hopefully instilling in her the importance of being with family, creating memories and being content and happy at home...

1. Baking biscuits for Father Christmas - Ruby LOVES to bake, and at the moment we are making something most weeks on her days off from pre-school, so I know she will love to spend Christmas Eve afternoon preparing some festive treats for Santa to nibble on. And of course the extra biscuits can be eaten for breakfast!

2. Leaving the treats by the hearth - I remember I loved this part of Christmas Eve. When you are really young, the thought of Santa enjoying a biscuit and some milk (or a sherry!) and Rudolph nibbling on some carrots, before flying off to their next stop was completely magical. And then of course, checking in the morning that they'd gone!

3. New pyjamas and a book - I remember as a child I often thought it odd that my parents didn't get me a Christmas gift. We obviously got our 'Santa gifts' but as far as I was concerned Santa chose and financed those himself! So I think for Ruby, we will allow her to open one gift which is from mum and dad on Christmas Eve. I've stolen an idea from my colleague and friend Laura of Circle of Pine Trees, who gives her three sons new pyjamas and a book every year. I LOVE this idea, as even though as time goes on, it won't necessarily be a 'surprise' gift, I know she will come to enjoy the familiarity of opening that present each year, and then being able to slip into those fresh pyjamas and read her new book at bedtime. As a pyjama and book lover myself, I think it is definitely a requirement of this tradition to also gift myself a new set and an inspiring read!

Three rituals that are at the heart of what I want our Christmas's to be about - family, simplicity and embracing hygge. Let's hope Santa enjoys our homemade biscuits! What are your Christmas Eve rituals or traditions? I'd so love to hear.

This post was a paid collaboration with Marks and Spencer who also gifted me some cosy pyjamas. Do check out their range of perfect Christmas Eve pyjamas. All ideas, thoughts and opinions are my own.

24 hours in Bristol with my new camera: Olympus Pen E-PL8

August 10, 2017

Recently I decided to take the plunge and upgrade my camera. For years I'd been using an old second hand Nikon D70, which is a good camera, but it is heavy and cumbersome and I always felt I wasn't quite getting the results I wanted from it. The fact it is so large and heavy meant I very rarely took it out, and even at events like family parties it felt too 'in your face' and people tend to clam up when you pull out a 'big camera' like that.

I had recently started listening to Stylonylon's Phototalk podcast where Julia talks a lot about her Olympus cameras, including the Olympus Pen E-PL8, and it sounded exactly like what I was looking for. From what Julia was saying I quickly realised that if I bought this camera it was definitely worth buying an additional lens for it, as she suggested the kit lens that comes with it isn't that great. Her recommendations were either the 45mm or the 17mm lens (or both!). So off I trotted to my local John Lewis to have a play with the camera and the lenses. Straight away I knew the 17mm was the one for me (of course it would be the more expensive one!). With the 45mm you have to be quite far back from your subject which doesn't really suit my style of shooting. After testing the camera out and a good old chat with the JL staff, I went ahead and took the plunge. The camera with the kit lens is £550. They didn't have the 17mm lens in stock, so I decided to look elsewhere for that, and found one on eBay, for about £70 cheaper than the high street price tag of £369.

LEFT: Taken with kit lens at max aperture of f3.5 RIGHT: Taken with 17mm lens at f1.8

I had a few days between buying the camera and receiving the new lens from the eBay seller, so spent some time testing it out with the kit lens. When the 17mm arrived, I was overjoyed! The difference was huge and I totally agree with Julia that it is worth adding this to your kit. Above I've tried to take the same shot with both lenses, and you can see the difference in the depth of field, which is down to the fact the kit lens only has a max aperture of f3.5 while the 17mm opens to f1.8. So, ever since, I have yet to take off the 17mm lens, there just doesn't seem any reason to switch back to the kit lens.

Above is one of the first photos I took with the 17mm lens, as I played around with it at home when it arrived. It's made me enjoy photographing Ruby even more now, when I can get her to stay still for 5 secs that is!

Technology really has moved on since my last camera purchase, and I was so excited by some of the features the Pen has. If you download the Olympus Image Share app you can do some use it as a remote control. So for the image above I had the camera set up on a surface, and then on my phone I could see what the camera was seeing and I could then release the shutter via my phone! I'm not one for taking many self portraits anyway, but it is such a handy feature and great if you do take outfit shots or self portraits.

Not only that, you can transfer images directly from the camera to your phone using the app, which I have used SO much. Obviously this is great for uploading pics straight to your social media, but also for sending to family or friends, rather than waiting til you get home to download them all. Another fave feature is the fact you can change format from normal (4:3) to square (1:1). Sometimes if I'm photographing for Instagram, I find it much easier to view in square than having to think about the crop afterwards, so this is super handy. That's why you'll notice a difference in the format of the images here as I keep jumping between the two!

We recently went on a little family trip to Bristol and it was the first time I'd really got to properly try the camera out. Of course it's size made such a difference, you barely even notice it in your bag or on your shoulder. With my Nikon, I'd so often take it away on trips, but then not bother to take it out and about as it was just too heavy to lug around all day. And of course, the fact I could send images direct to my phone meant I could share moments from our day on Instagram without waiting to download them - or like I used to do, having to take the same photos on my phone! So, here's a little photo story of our 24 hours spent in Bristol when my new camera got a really good airing....

We stayed in a really gorgeous Airbnb apartment in the Gloucester Road area, which was just a bus ride into the centre of Bristol with lots of lovely cafes and restaurants nearby.

On our first afternoon, I stumbled across new candle shop Osmology when we were exploring the Christmas Steps. I had recently heard of them online but hadn't realised the shop was there. It is beautiful and filled with so many of my favourite candle brands. I'm not sure why I didn't treat myself to a candle, I think I was too busy taking photos!

That evening we headed down to Wapping Wharf for dinner, which is lovely, but unfortunately it was raining so I didn't really bother with taking photos, so this is from Saturday morning, when we headed down to Clifton.

Papersmiths was a must-visit of course - totally dreamy as expected! And then we popped across the street into Anna Cake Couture for hot drinks and macarons...

We then headed back over the suspension bridge to the car and headed to our last shopping stop - Mon Pote. Another shop I've been dying to visit and it didn't disappoint! After a mooch around Up Fest (the street art festival that was on) and a messy burger from a van, we bundled back into the car and drove back to London, just as the rain came on again!

BTW - This post is in no way a sponsored post (I wish!) - I've just had lot of questions about my new camera so thought it would be useful to share my review of it. Also, I had loads of pics of Bristol that I didn't want to leave languishing on my computer forever! I loved Bristol by the way, I can't wait to go back!

If you've got any questions about the camera at all, just drop me a line. I found it really useful listening to Stylonnylon's podcasts and also watching Emily Quinton's videos about it. Bye for now!

#mynestandburrow - get involved!

July 10, 2017

I don't know about you, but I'm always on the look out for new hashtags to use on my Instagram feed. It's a great way for your images to get seen by new people and also a fun way to interact with the creative community on there. I recently came across the #mynestandburrow tag, run by Suzanne of Nest and Burrow. Suzanne creates some amazing woven wall hangings to decorate your home with, and she started this hashtag recently to get folk sharing images of their homes (or nest!) with the incentive of winning a lovely prize.

Suzanne explains: '#mynestandburrow is about the way you lovingly create spaces in your home {nesting} and the resulting magic that provides a nourishing environment for you and your family’s wellbeing. It’s about being inspired by nature, bringing the outdoors in, light, natural materials, as well as a strong interior design ethic that says You!

Use the tag to share your favourite spaces and pockets of your home. The cherished places where you entertain, spend time with family and friends, meditate, create, cook, sleep....or simply just be.'

I really enjoyed getting involved in the last challenge, and was so thrilled that Suzanne contacted me to ask if I'd like to be a guest judge on the next one! absolutely I said! For this challenge you can win a lovely hanging planter by Ruby Cubes, simply by sharing your pics. Well, there's a few little rules for entering which are below! So read on....

The theme for this next challenge is 'Summer'. Share pics of how you've been bringing elements of summer into your interiors, that enable you to enjoy your home to the full in this special season. Plus, don't forget your gardens and their connection to your home. It could even be somewhere you're staying for a summer holiday and that you just love!

To enter simply follow the three of us: @nestandburrowuk @patchworkhrmy and @ruby_cubes_exeter and tag your pictures of your summer. You have two weeks to enter!

Something as simple as bringing in a few summer blooms from the garden to display or the early evening light streaming through your window, or simply a spot that you love to sit during the summer months, soaking up the warmth and the longer, lighter days. So get involved folks, I can't wait to see your images and pick a winner! Good Luck! x

Ectopic pregnancy - my experience

January 27, 2017

I don't often go 'off topic' here at Patchwork Harmony, but once in while things occur that I feel the need to share. Sometimes it's something I think others might benefit from, like hypnobirthing, sometimes it's to raise awareness, and sometimes it's just therapy for myself, I find it helps to write things down - especially difficult experiences - it helps me to process it all.

So that's why I'm writing this post - for all of the above reasons, but also to reject the taboo that seems to surround the subject of losing a baby. It is a very personal matter of course, and understandably some women would rather keep it private, but for me, I always knew that if it happened to me I wouldn't bottle it up, I would share my experience and hopefully reach out to other women going through the same thing, so we can hold hands together and remember we are not alone.

Weirdly, I've always kind of felt that at some point I might have a miscarriage, and I'm guessing that feeling is down to the fact that '1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage' but little did I know what would unfold shortly after we discovered I was pregnant on New Years Eve.

This picture is me on Friday 13th (unlucky for me it seems!) shortly after surgery to remove my right fallopian tube and our 6 week old foetus that was developing in there. It was just two weeks after finding out I was pregnant, and the diagnosis was an ectopic pregnancy. They told us that as it wasn't failing naturally which often happens, they would have to operate before the tube ruptures which is incredibly dangerous.

My reason for sharing this is not to scare anyone, or worry you if you are in the early stages of pregnancy, but more to highlight the condition and to point out the signs. Call it women's intuition, but weirdly I had a feeling from the start that things weren't right. While we were elated to find out I was expecting on New Years Eve, for the next week I kept commenting on how I didn't 'feel pregnant'. We reminded ourselves that symptoms often don't start till later, but deep down I had a niggle. I tried to convince myself otherwise, and even brushed off some spotting, as I remembered having it with my first pregnancy in the early weeks so pretty much ignored it.

The following Saturday - a week to the day after finding out about the pregnancy, I had a bit more blood, which concerned me enough to go to A&E. After 4 hours of waiting, all I was given was an early scan appointment in 5 days time. After the A&E trip the bleeding completely stopped and I relaxed a bit. But then two days later I started getting a dull achey pain in my right side, which went round into my lower back and down my thigh. Again, I remembered getting aches last time, so assigned it to stretching pains. But the day before I was due to have the scan, my worries came back. While the pain wasn't agony, it did seem to be worsening. Without wanting to rush to A&E again when I knew i had the scan the next day I turned to Dr. Google. We all do it, even though we know we shouldn't,, and this is what I want to highlight. Everything I read online seemed to suggest that unless you were bleeding everything was ok - aches and pains are normal in pregnancy - bleeding is the only thing to be concerned about. THIS IS NOT THE CASE! While I'd had a very small amount the week before, I was having none now, I could easily have reassured myself and just tried to ignore the aches. I'd also read about cysts that often cause pain, so I tried to tell myself that it could be that. The point is, everyone's symptoms are different, so don't ignore any bleeding or pain - and try not to go online - even if you think it's 'probably normal' - just get it checked.

Despite what I'd read, by that evening I knew that there was definitely something going on, so I asked my hubby to come with me to the scan. Thankfully he did, as hearing the sonographer say 'I can't see anything in your uterus' was pretty heart-breaking. We had a little bit of hope when they said that perhaps my dates were wrong and it was too early to see the baby. They also suggested that the pain I was having was a cyst, so when we were sent home that afternoon, I tried to remain positive that this was the case. But then a phone call from the hospital suggested that the chances of ectopic were looking quite high and that I shouldn't drive or be alone in case the tube burst. This was absolute worst case scenario, but that was all I heard, and I spent the night terrified that it might happen. They told me that if my tube burst I would get pain in my shoulder - I spent the evening thinking my shoulder was getting sore. (your mind can play some cruel tricks!)

The next morning - Friday the 13th (!) - we were back at the hospital where a consultant scanned me and confirmed the ectopic pregnancy. I was admitted straight away and went to theatre that afternoon. It's been two weeks since then, and I'm recovering well, Of course, it’s not just physical healing, it’s emotional too.. Unlike the traumatic delivery I had when giving birth to Ruby at least I was rewarded with a beautiful baby girl. Sadly this time, I went through the trauma and pain of surgery, but without that wonderful end result. I'm thankful though that we caught it early enough as the consequences could have been very different had the pregnancy continued to developed in my tube.

I'm not looking for sympathy by writing this post, I really am feeling fine and dealing with it well. All I wanted was to tell my story and highlight the condition - one which I’d never even really contemplated - so that others are aware. I also wanted to be open about a subject that is often veiled in silence, especially as nearly everyone I've spoken to since has been touched by the loss of a baby, but yet, no one talks about it. It's nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed of, it's not a failure, it's just life. it's bloody hard to make a human and sometimes it just doesn't work out.

Earlier this week, when I had my dressings removed and I saw the scarring, my resolve to stay strong did falter. Again, feeling sad that I've been left with this physical reminder and no new baby to override the pain with happiness. But then, my husband said 'They are proof of your journey through life, they are part of our story.' He's so right, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, “Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it” – we are moving on with positivity and good vibes and the hope of no more Friday the 13th's like that one!

If you've been affected by ectopic pregnancy or are concerned you might be having one, then the Ectopic Pregnancy Trust is a really useful resource. But as I said, ANY bleeding or pain - just get checked, I'm so glad I didn't ignore what my body and mind were telling me. xxx

Discovering knitting

January 3, 2017

If you read my last post and/or follow me on Instagram, you might have heard me mention that I've been trying my hand at knitting recently? Well, I thought I'd fill you in a little more about how I've discovered this new found love for the craft.

I spend so much time staring at a computer screen or my phone, that it has actually caused me some problems with my eyes, so I really wanted to find an activity that would take me away from the screen and that was creative, and knitting kept popping up as a possible option. My mum is a fantastic knitter and has made lots of things for Ruby and also knits for charity, but one of my memories from my childhood is her trying to teach me, and me throwing a strop because I couldn't get it! So I've never really tried it again since then, so when We Are Knitters got in touch about collaborating, I had to admit my novice knitter status to them! Thankfully they didn't mind that I was a newbie, and it seemed like fate that it came along at the exact time when I was looking for a new hobby.

After perusing their fab range of knitting kits, I decided to go for the Nick Blanket kit. which is beginner level - that seemed like the best idea! This gorgeous package arrived shortly after, and as a packaging design geek, it certainly got me even more excited about my little project! Everything you need is inside - needles, yarn, instructions, sewing needle and a sweet little label to add to your finished item.

While the instructions for making the blanket are included, if you are a complete beginner like me, you will need to refer to the internet for how to actually knit! As in the different stitches and how to cast on and off. We Are Knitters have lots of tutorials or you can check out youtube, as there are often different ways of doing some things. I was pleasantly surprised at how quickly I picked up the stitches I needed for the blanket and after a few practice squares, I got cracking with the blanket.

In the run up to Christmas my hubby had lots of parties and work commitments in the evenings, so I found myself curled up on the sofa completely immersed in the project and absolutely loving it! I managed to get it completed just before Christmas and I am so chuffed with it!

Of course as a first attempt it is not perfect and I learnt a few things along the way (like don't leave your ends too short when you are adding a new ball of wool!) but overall it turned out pretty well.

The finished blanket is not huge, but it would make a perfect baby blanket, or is big enough to drape over your legs on a chilly evening, or for adding texture to a chair or sofa, The wool is so gorgeous and chunky that it feels really snuggly and lovely. Ruby has already claimed it for herself and keeps lying on the floor with it!

I've definitely got the knitting bug now and am looking for a new project. This cushion looks great, and I'd love to try the fabric yarn and We Are Knitters have so many gorgeous jumper patterns like this one I'd love to try once I'm a little more advanced!

So, if you've got the urge for a new hobby this year, I can totally recommend it. And now is the perfect time as We Are Knitters have a sale on right now, so do have a peek at their website.

*This post was written in collaboration with We Are Knitters, but all choices, opinions and knitting mistakes are my own!*

Photos: Caroline Rowland

My year in pictures 2016

December 31, 2016

Another year, gone by in a flash! Well, 2016 has been a bit of a strange year in terms of the world we live in. I'm not a big one for politics, but it does feel like the future is quite uncertain, and we don't really know what to expect in the coming years. But as always, I like to take time at the end of each year to reflect, and appreciate the smaller things in life, the things that are personal to me, that have made me happy, proud, or even sad or frustrated, but they are the events that have made up my past 12 months.

This year (and also part of last year!) has mainly been consumed by the process of moving house. Our original plan was to move by Christmas 2015, but we just made it into our new home for this Christmas! It was nice though at the start of the year to have our old flat featured in Psychologies magazine, it was a lovely shoot by Penny Wincer and a nice way to record our previous home.

In fact at the start of 2016, I wrote a post with my plans for the year ahead, with the idea of looking back on the at the end of the year to see how things had went. So, tick, we managed to move house!

I'd also just started a new part time job with interiors brand One World Trading Co. back in January. I'm still doing this role, looking after the content for their blog, social media and newsletter, and it's been nice to see how the brand has developed over the last year. As well as lots of new lifestyle photography on their site, we've been working a lot with bloggers which has been fun, plus they recently opened a concession in Harvey Nichols! Do have a peep at their site if you have a mo - www.one.world

The other major plan I had at the start of the year was to relaunch 91 Magazine. After a year away from it, I decided it was time to really go for it, and along with my fab new team, we certainly did that! It's been a great year for the magazine, with two print editions publishing, one in S/S and one in A/W. We now have it stocked in around 70 UK shops, and a few outside the UK, and we've worked with some amazing brands. The above image is from our Summer launch event at Anthropologie! Anyway, you can read more about our first year in print on the 91 blog.

With the whole moving house thing this year we found two things - firstly we couldn't plan any holidays as we never knew from month to month if we might finally exchange, and secondly, we kinda lost interest in our flat. It seemed pointless to spend any more time or money on it when we'd be leaving it soon. Looking back, this seemed to free up a bit more time for family days out, plus Ruby was finally at an age were trips into London and elsewhere were becoming slightly less stressful and more fun. We pottered around Petersham Nurseries, we enjoyed art at the Tate Modern, and we relaxed in the cafes of Brighton.

In May we even ventured down to Kent on a lovely Spring day to the Decorative Living Fair. It's always a nice day out although I found it a tad frustrating as I couldn't buy anything yet as we were STILL waiting to move! The above pic is a slightly awkward family shot of us out in Richmond Park. I like it though as we don't often seem to get many of us all together!

Ruby turned two in July, and it wasn't long after that we took our first trip away without her, finally feeling 'OK' with the idea of being apart from her for more than one night. We went to a wedding in Scotland, and really let our hair down for a few nights while also enjoying the magnificent scenery of the west coast of the country. I loved the minimal bedroom that we stayed in at the venue.

After that little trip, completing on the sale of our flat finally felt like it was in touching distance. At the end of September it happened! A whole year and a bit after we put it up for sale! After seven years of living there, we did feel a little sad, but we were literally bursting at the seams there, and we were totally ready for a new start.

We are so glad we perservered, as after our first three months in our new home, we are pleased to say we love it! The house needs loads of work but we've already made a good start. The space is great, the light is lovely and it just 'feels' nice. It's true what they say about just knowing when you've found the right house - I still remember I didn't sleep a wink the night after we first viewed it, because I couldn't stop thinking about it and what we could do to it!

We've been mainly focusing on trying to get rid of all of the dark or neon colours that were everywhere! So no rooms are 'finished' yet, but we are getting there! We've got a new floor for the living room coming in the new year which I'm really excited about so I will continue to keep you posted on our progress on here. You can see more of this mini bedroom makeover here.

I've been enjoying spending lots of time in the new house, and keeping cosy during the colder months, and I've taken up a new craft! I've been busy knitting this We Are Knitters blanket, and I honestly did not expect to enjoy knitting so much! I've actually finished the blanket now, so I will share the results on here soon too. If anyone has tips for resources for some modern knitting projects do let me know.

Following the craziness of the house move and a very busy year work wise, I felt the need for a quick little break by the coast, so we took ourselves off to Norfolk and stayed at Ford House. If you ever get the chance, book yourself a few days here, it is gorgeous and such a lovely part of the country to explore. More pics are here.

The year was rounded off by our first Christmas in our new home, and it was lovely. It's the first year Ruby has had an understanding of what's going on, and I loved seeing her so excited. I'm looking forward to many more Christmasses here!

So that was my 2016! It was frustrating year at times, but it has definitely turned out well in the end. I have a few question marks about where I want to go with a few things in the next year, but for now I think I'm just going to sit back and take stock, and I'm sure things will all become clear in the new year!

Thanks again for stopping by despite my slight lack of posts this year! I've been writing this blog now for 8 years, so it very much feels like a part of me, and I'm looking forward to making it a more frequented place in 2017! Happy New Year all, see you on the other side! xxx

Slipper love - Baabuk

December 19, 2016

I tend to think that in this world there are two types of people - slipper wearers and non-slipper wearers. I am a slipper wearer. As a child, I have memories of getting a new pair of slippers every Christmas, so I guess I've been a lifelong slipper wearer! Whereas my hubby is definitely not one!

So I must admit I was very excited to be sent these beautiful wool slippers recently from Swiss brand Baabuk. They are a relatively new business, only starting out in 2013, but owners Galina and Dan are super passionate about wool and their footwear products, which you can tell just from their website where they give a real insight into their product and how it is made.

They are so comfy, and feel really sturdy - I've literally nearly walked out of the house a few times in them without realising! I also feel incredibly European walking around the house in them, so much more stylish than a ratty pair of Primark slippers!

They also very kindly sent (the cutest!) little pair for Ruby too. The smallest size they do is EU24, which is a UK7, which is a bit big for her, so I wasn't planning to give them to her until her feet had grown. But then, she spotted these photos on my computer the other day when I was editing them and said 'There are your slippers mum! and there are mine too!' She's no fool! So I let her try them on and she LOVES them! She is literally obsessed with them! They are a tiny bit big, but they don't generally fall off, in fact, I can't get them off her!

The slippers are made in Nepal, and Baabuk guarantee that their staff there earn higher-than-average salaries and have good working conditions. They really are beautifully made, and come in these lovely bags, making them feel that little bit more special.

I can't stop taking pictures of Ruby's little pair! This was also probably the only time I've ever got her to stay still for more than 5 seconds to take a photo, she clearly wanted to show them off!

Oh and if you aren't an avid slipper wearer like myself, then do check out Baabuk's range of wool sneakers, they are machine-washable, and can be worn all year round - keeping your feet warm in winter and cool in summer - I love the Grey and Turquoise pair myself...

Thank you to Baabuk for gifting us these slippers, I think Ruby and I will be wearing matching pairs for many years to come!

A truly excellent vacuum cleaner!

December 13, 2016

Ok, so this isn't my usual kind of post. I don't tend to talk about tech, or gadgets or appliances, let's face it, it's not the most interesting or inspiring aspect within the home. And to be honest, I've always preferred to spend my money on the 'pretty' elements, and have scrimped on the essentials, assuming that all appliances pretty much do the same job, and generally cutting corners on those not so sexy items! But since moving into our new place, I weirdly feel like a grown-up (well at least a little bit more than before!), and perhaps it's the idea that we see this as our forever house, or at least a very long term one, that I suddenly feel the importance of having things that work well and do their job significantly better than others on the market. I read SO many reviews when selecting our washing machine and dishwasher, and am really happy with what we choose, and for the first time ever we have a tumble dryer - SO grown up! No more laundry hanging off every surface!

So whenever I was offered a new vacuum cleaner to try out, I jumped at the chance to see if it really was a superior product, that would make chores that little bit more bearable. I was sent a Oreck Magnesium RS - an upright cleaner which is in fact the lightest bagged vacuum in the UK. We've never had an upright version before, so I must admit we were a little dubious, especially my other half - he was extremely cynical about our new appliance, UNTIL he tried it....

We were both hugely impressed with it, the suction was fantastic, and it pretty much does the work for you. It seems to propel itself across the floor, making it really easy to use. It goes almost horizontal for going under furniture and you can easily switch between high and low power on the handle. I nearly got the hubby to write this blog post as he was loving it that much! He was even telling family about it during a meal out! (yes, we are thrilling company with our vacuum cleaner chat!)

So are there any negative points? Well - kind of - yes. It's not great for stairs and without a detachable hose you can't really get in corners and along skirting boards so well. But otherwise, it does a great job across carpet and hard floors, which we currently have both of (FYI - those dark maroon carpets WILL be going soon! Not my choice obvs!). It's lightweight and can be stored easily, you can even hang it if you wish.

I must admit, I had not heard or Oreck before, but I can now safely say I can see why the 1960s hotel staff they was originally designed for were so enamoured by these cleaners! It must have made their jobs so much easier, I'm certainly whizzing around our house with it! (or at least the hubby is!) ;)

You can check out all the specifications and reviews for the Oreck Magnesium RS here. Thank you to Oreck for gifting me this item, all opinions and images are my own.

My new job

January 19, 2016

Those of you who follow me on Instagram may have heard me mention a new job which I started last week? I thought I would explain a little bit about it and the company I'm working for, as I think lots of you will like it, and hopefully you'll be keen to follow along with what I am doing with them too.

I've taken on a part time position working with interiors brand called One World Trading Company as their Content Director. I'm still freelance, and it is flexible enough to work around my other work and family, plus I'm getting to do lots of lovely creative things, and particularly I'm doing a bit more styling which I love!

The company is a family run business, based in Chessington, Surrey, and has just celebrated it's 25th birthday last year! Starting off sourcing candles from Swaziland for the UK market, the company has expanded massively over the years, and has focussed mainly on supplying furniture and homewares to trade, but they have recently made the move into direct retail sales and I am really excited to be part of letting the world know about One World!

They have a shop based in Haslemere in Surrey, but the main focus is their website, featuring much of their products, with new items being added all the time. There's lots to suit all tastes too - from vintage French chic through to relaxed rustic and industrial cool. They stock large furniture such as sofas, dining tables and cabinets right down to the small details such as glassware, vases and crockery.

I will be dealing with the blog content and social media, amongst other things, and I hope to work with some other fab bloggers and brands going forward. It's an exciting start to the year. I'd LOVE it if you'd pop over and check out their social media pages and say hi to the new girl! :)

One World Trading Co on Instagram

One World Trading Co on Facebook

One World Trading Co on Twitter

One World Trading on Pinterest

One World Trading on Google+

One World Trading Co on Houzz

You can check out the online shop here and keep updated on what's happening on the blog and new products ranges by signing up to their mailing list (at the bottom of the homepage). Oh, and if you spot anything you like and treat yourself you can share your pics with us via the #oneworldlifestyle hashtag! :)

plans for 2016

January 7, 2016

So far, 2016 has mainly consisted of grey clouds and rain here in the UK. We spent a week over new year at my parents in Northern Ireland, and it was nearly impossible to get out of the house because of all the rain! Not to mention that Ruby had a suspected case of measles, so we were pretty much quarantined until it cleared up. Yesterday was my first day back home and back to work, and it kicked off with a meeting with the new 91 Magazine deputy editor. (more on that later!) Afterwards I felt inspired and rejuvenated and ready to take on 2016! I thought I'd note down a few of my plans both personal and professional that I can look back on next year and see how they all panned out...

- I'm taking on a new part time job which will be 3 days a week. I will tell you more about this when I start next week! I'm still freelance, but it will just be a regular gig meaning a regular income which is great.

- I am relaunching 91 Magazine this year. I'm super excited about this, there will be a new look, new website, new blog, new team and much more, so make sure to stay tuned for all the news!

- I hope we will finally get to move house. We are currently in the process of selling our flat and buying a house. I'm desperate to move as soon as possible as we are literally bursting at the seams here. Hopefully there will be lots to share on here once we start redecorating the new place!

- In conjunction with moving I really want to try and declutter. Although you wouldn't think it by the state of our house at the moment, I am actually a bit of a neat freak and it makes me feel uneasy when there is mess and 'stuff' everywhere, so I want to try and simplify things a little if I can.

- Finally, my plan is to not plan too much. I'm always looking ahead to the next project or what's happening next week, next month etc, I want to try and enjoy the moment a bit more, especially when it comes to Ruby. It's a bit of cliche to say, but she really is growing up so quickly so I want to make sure I appreciate every little part of her development.

What are you plans for 2016? I'd really love to hear if you've got anything big on the horizon for this year that you want to share! x

My year in pictures 2015

December 23, 2015

Wow, I can't believe 2015 is nearly over already! It went by in a flash! I guess that's how life goes when you are juggling a toddler, a career and trying to sell and buy a house! Anyway, as always, I like to reflect on the past year, even if it is just for me, as it helps me to appreciate everything that has happened and not worry so much that I'm not getting enough done.

The year started off with lots of book related news - of course the announcement that my very first book would be publishing in October, but also some other projects I'd worked on, including Shed Decor which I sourced all the photography for.

Ruby turned 6 months in January so I finally felt she was old enough for me to leave her (with dad!) while I went to Paris to do some shoots for the book. I was shooting with one of the fabulous photographers who worked on my book - Simon Upton - and we shot two shops: Adeline Klam and Le Rocketship as well as their homes, I absolutely loved working on the shoots, and was a bit sad I missed out on the rest. Both shopowners were SO lovely, and I felt so inspired just hanging out with them for the day. The first pic below is Adeline's home and the next shot is Benoit's home of Le Rocketship.

Above two images, photo credit: Simon Upton/Jacqui Small Publishing

It was pretty much full steam ahead with the book for the first six months of the year, but I still had to fit in other work around it including my craft blog posts for ao.com /life. In February I did a fun Valentines post with five handmade card ideas which you can check out here for next Valentines day!

In March, we finally got round to decorating the last room in the house that needed it - the bathroom. It was probably the only room that was fine when we moved in, and we easily could have left it, but after getting a new boiler installed it needed redecorating as the walls had got damaged plus we had built a new cupboard around the boiler. I'm so glad we did in the end as it is a much nicer space now. You can read the full post and see more pics here.

And of course we celebrated Easter by dressing Ruby up and eating lots of chocolate and mini eggs!

In April I was featured in Prima Makes magazine which is always nice! And I took Ruby to my parents in N. Ireland, while hubby painted our floor white. What a great decision that was, it made such a difference to our dining area and hallway.

This time of year is definitely my favourite. You start coming out of hibernation after winter, it's warmer, the flowers are blooming and I just generally feel more motivated. We finished off our kitchen renovation with the kitchen island worktop, which was a long and arduous battle. You can see how we did the DIY worktop here and also the full kitchen makeover tour.

I also got busy with some spring/summer inspired craft projects, including this plant pot holder for the garden, and a floral wreath using my all time favourite flowers, peonies!

I also took a little trip over to Nice in May to celebrate 30 years of friendship with my best friend. We stayed in the amazing Negresco hotel on the promenade, drinking cocktails, laughing, chatting and shopping. It was a much needed holiday and I realised how good it is for the soul to spend quality time with someone who has been in your life since you were 4 years old, but don't get to see that often. Of course, even on holiday I've always got my eyes peeled for lovely shops, and this one called Cabane caught my eye in the old town area of Nice...

In June, our home was featured on Apartment Therapy which was a bit of a 'pinch me' moment! Photographer Cathy Pyle came and shot the pictures which were really fantastic, and it's such a nice 'souvenir' to have of our home as we are selling it and moving on, but we will always be able to look back on these gorgeous images.

Blogtacular happened in June and it's always a really fun, inspiring day, where you get to hang out with like minded people and get motivated to get to work on your blog. Afterwards I shared what I think the benefits of attending a bloggers conference are.

I finally got round to printing and displaying some of our wedding photos, exactly two years after we got married! Why does it always take us so long to do these things?! I'm so pleased I did as I love looking at them regularly and remembering what a great day it was.

It's the time of year for weddings of course and I attended two in July. First one in London of a dear friend, and the second in Spain, when I was bridesmaid for my now sister in law. How stunning is this bouquet at the London wedding?!

And in Spain, the pink and orange colour theme was stunning...

In between the two weddings, we celebrated Ruby's first birthday, with a circus themed party at home. It's as much a celebration of making it through your first year as parents I think! It was such a lovely day though, and it's really unbelievable to look back and see the speed of change and development in your little human's first year of life. It's pretty incredible.

August saw another trip to N.Ireland, and another wedding, when Ruby stole the show in this super cute little number...

When we got home, I was greeted by the latest issue of Mollie Makes which featured our home! It was really lovely to be featured as their home tour, after writing about so many of them for the magazine. Such an honour, and again a lovely memento to have of our time living here. It was also featured on Made.com/unboxed this month! Our house has been getting around! ;-)

To finish off the month of August, I went up to Milton Keynes to take part in a styling collaboration with Argos. It was such a fun job and day, and made me really want to do more styling work. I styled a child's bedroom, which you can find out more about here.

September's highlight had to be my trip to Munich. I'd been nominated for a blog award by Callwey, a German book publisher, and they had invited us to a day and evening of blogger activities and an award ceremony. I didn't win anything, but it didn't matter as it was such a FAB weekend, and they had published a book to go with it, which includes some of my photographs and is really really lovely. You can read more about the trip here and here - the second pic below was from a styling event we attended at a shop i featured in my book - Room to Dream - such a lovely shop if you are ever in Munich!

In September I also started the publicity in the run up to the publication of my book. I put together a special issue of 91 Magazine which was a little preview of what is inside the book. You can still view this if you have not got the book yet and would like a sneaky peek... view the preview here.

We finished off September with a little break from all the busyness with a week in Spain. It was lovely to get away and see some sun and blue sky, although I''m not sure 'relaxing' is how I'd describe a holiday with a toddler in tow! Ruby loved running around on the beach and eating her lunch outside, so it's worth it for those little moments.

In October, I turned 34 (blimey, mid thirties!) and I celebrated with breakfast out with the hubby, and a whizz around the Decorative Living Fair in Chelsea. I didn't buy anything though, as we are now in that weird state of flux where we are selling our house so there is no point buying anything new until we have moved... (much to my disappointment!)

October was of course also the highly anticipated month of my book release! Obviously a huge highlight of my career! It really is a funny feeling to see your book that you worked on for months and months on the shelves in Waterstones and other lovely shops! I've really enjoyed seeing people's snaps on Instagram too, either when they've spotted it in a shop or taking pics of their own copy. Just hashtag #theshopkeepershome if you've got any you'd like to add.

I also attended the Amara Interior Blog Awards ceremony, at which I was up for an award for this blog! I was in the interior magazine blog category, which on reflection perhaps wasn't quite the right slot for me, as this blog is a bit more a personal account of my love for interiors than an accompanying blog for 91 Magazine. I didn't win, but it was a really fabulous evening, and I enjoy those occasional chances to get out and chat with lots of other inspiring creative people.

Following these high points in my life, it was followed by a very difficult time for our family. I haven't mentioned it on here so far, but as this is a round up of my year (good and bad) I thought I would now. Sadly at the end of October my husband's father passed away not long after being given a diagnosis of liver cancer. It was a huge shock, as only a few weeks before we'd all been out in the pub together for lunch, and there was no hint to what was just around the corner. He was truly a wonderful man, who brought up my husband and his brother (as a single dad for a time) to be respectful, caring, hardworking men and I am thankful for the last 13 years I got to call him my father-in-law. He will be sadly missed from our family, but we have vowed to always tell Ruby about how great her grandpa was. This pic was taken at our wedding in 2013. x

I wasn't sure whether to go ahead with the planned book launch event at the start of November, but as a family we decided that we would as my father-in-law was so proud of what I'd achieved with the book. It was a lovely evening with my close friends, my publishers and fellow bloggers and work colleagues.

And then it was December already! The last few weeks have been spent getting ready for Christmas and preparing for 2016. I'm mainly preparing for a new job that I am taking on in January which I will tell you all about when i start! And working on plans for relaunching 91 Magazine! It's been a year since I published it, and I was so unsure how to move forward with it, but I'm finally excited about it again, as I have got a deputy editor joining me who again I will reveal in the new year, and also I'm hoping to get some other creative people on board to help me out. If you are interested, you can see more about the available roles here. There is going to be a brand new look, website and logo and lots of new features inside, but I will of course keep you updated on all of that as it happens!

I'm taking a little break now until the new year, so I want to wish you a very merry Christmas and lots of joy in the new year! Thanks as always for your support and stopping by to read my ramblings, I'm looking forward to a creative and inspiring 2016! You can follow me on Instagram for little snippets from the holidays of course!

xxx

All images by Caroline Rowland / Patchwork Harmony unless otherwise stated.

Is crafting still fun when it becomes your career?

September 8, 2015

Recently it has been proven that crafting for a hobby is a beneficial activity on our lives and health. For those of us who already partake in a creative lifestyle, I'm sure most would confirm that sitting down and making something brings a sense of relaxation, you become fully immersed in the activity, and your troubles and problems are forgotten for a while. There is also the wonderful sense of achievement when you complete a project and either wear it, display it or give it to a friend.

Some studies are suggesting that it is highly beneficial for people suffering from anxiety, depression and stress due to it's calming and often repetitive nature, and there are even studies showing that it can delay the onset of dementia and old age. I guess this makes sense as our brain is a muscle and needs to be exercised, so the more we challenge it, the stronger it will stay.

The Handmade Fair, hosted by Kirstie Allsopp has carried out a survey to find out more about crafting and wellbeing, and found that: "one in three use crafting as a way to focus better on day to day life and one in five like to craft to boost their confidence. A quarter of those surveyed admitted that crafting helps to give them ‘peace of mind’."

But what about if you want to pursue crafting as a career? Is it still so fun and relaxing? Or does doing it as a job transform it into a stressful activity? I spoke to three successful participants of The Handmade Fair taking place on 18th-20th Sept to find out - Zeena Shah, a print maker, Poppy Chancellor, a papercutter and Lisa Comfort, owner of sewing cafe, Sew Over It.

PH: Having a career in crafting/making, do you find that creating still relaxes you and makes you feel good, or is it now just another part of your job?

Zeena: Yes definitely, I will always love the process of printmaking, screen printing and designing. I find I am my happiest and most inspired doing these things and always drawn to them. I think for me this changes when I have a particularly large order to fill. As all our products are individually hand screen printed and sewn at our studio it can become pretty repetitive if you have a 100 pillows to print and sew, this is when I find myself falling out of love with it a little bit as can be expected.

Poppy: I absolutely still feel relaxed when I'm papercutting. That's the joy of it. I have different pressures and time constraints now that I do it professionally, but if I didn't still love it, I wouldn't do it.

Lisa: It depends on what the criteria of the making is. If it is something I have to do and have time restrictions and I am not particularly interested in making at that time then it does lose its relaxation and appeal but I still love sewing for pleasure. I don’t get a chance to do it that often (I sew every week for work but for myself with no pressure that is rare!) but when I do I love it. In fact tomorrow I have got the day free to sew and I am so looking forward to it!

PH: Do you do any other type of crafting outside of your job to chill out?

Zeena: I love making things and can always be found doing some sort of craft in my spare time although rare it's a definite de-stresser! I've started dressmaking and really love the process of constructing a garment, I just wish I had more time for it!

Poppy: I'm a total perfectionist when it comes to making things. When I try new crafts I get worried about not getting it right. That's why I run from tent to tent at The Handmade Fair trying every workshop. It's a safe place to get things wrong and have a laugh.

Lisa: I tried knitting but I found that too slow. I do a lot of upcycling of furniture and decorating at home. I love that. I have always loved spending time make my home look nice. Even from a young age, I would spend hours in my room, rearranging and painting different bits!

PH: Are you still as passionate about your craft as when you first began? How do you continue to inspire your creativity so you don't become tired of it?

Zeena: Yes if not more so! I love printing and am constantly inspired. I've just finished writing my first book about 'How to Print Fabric' this consists of 20 table top techniques to create print designs onto fabric using everyday things from the home. This was such an inspiring project to work on, I wanted to make printing really easy and accessible to those who might not have access to course or printing facilities. All you need for one project are some elastic bands, ink pad and a piece of fabric - easy!

Poppy: Luckily with papercutting there's so much you can do. More than playing with technique you can also be inspired with the design. I always work from my drawings and love researching different imagery. If you become tired of what you're doing it's time to reinvent your approach.

Lisa: Yes absolutely. In fact I recently talked about this in my new vlog - I did a Q&A video and this came up. I am definitely still passionate about sewing. That is what gets me through the hard times! As many will say, running your own business is so much work and there are times when you ask yourself - what am I doing?! But then I always know that I am doing the right thing as the sewing world is where I belong, it is my home and my people. My vlog has actually been really helpful in keeping my creativity going as it gives me an excuse to buy new fabrics, explore new patterns and make clothes that I want. I am very lucky that I can call that my job!

Dress making patterns and fabrics at Sew Over It. (via Lisa's instagram)

PH: What advice would you give to any budding makers who would like to turn their hobby into a career, so that they don't lose their love of it?

Zeena: What made a huge difference for me was outsourcing part of my process to people I trusted when I was overwhelmed with orders. It seems obvious but can be really difficult when you live and breathe your business, letting go of the little things is sometimes a real saving grace. For example having my cushions sewn up or tags printed as opposed to being hand stamped saves a lot of time and your sanity! So i'd definitely say don't hesitate and it's money well spent as it frees you up for the more important things - like running your business!

Poppy: My first piece of advice would be to get good. Practice until your proud of what you're making. I don't know if that process ever ends but you have to keep pushing to make great work. Secondly, make your subject matter relevant. Do something no one else is doing. With craft everyone has seen it before so it's important to make people notice you. A sense of humour always adds a lightness to people's work that I love.

Lisa: You will inevitably move more and more away from the actual craft as you get bogged down in the admin and more boring sides of running a business but remember why you did it and be strict with yourself so that you keep a hand in. I still teach a class every week and sew clothes for myself every month. I decided to hire more staff to help with running the business so that I had time to keep sewing as I fear that if I stopped then that would show through the business.

I don't know about you, but I found the answers these three ladies gave really inspiring as well as useful and practical. It's so nice to hear that all three absolutely still have the love for their craft, even if it is not always relaxing! I'd love to hear from anyone else who is running a craft business, and whether you feel the same or do you feel so bogged down with business that the making side is now stressful. Or if you are thinking of starting a craft business and found the interviews above useful.

Hope to see some of you at The Handmade Fair - I hope to pop over on Sat 19th Sept - it's the perfect chance to try your hand at some new crafts, and get inspired by all those creative talents!

A circus themed birthday party

July 14, 2015

If you follow me on Instagram, you may have already seen quite a few posts about Ruby's first birthday. It's been so lovely celebrating this special time, and while she won't remember it, and doesn't really know what's going on, I still wanted to throw a lovely party for her with our family and friends. She will be able to look back on the photos one day, and see the efforts me and her dad put in! haha!

Her dad took care of the food side while I of course got stuck into the decorating part of the day. I decided to have a bit of a circus theme, but in a subtle way if that makes sense! I love the 'Toot Sweet' range by Meri Meri, so I ordered a few bits and bobs from there, and then scoured the interweb for other things to add. I purchased some paper plates, straws and bunting from Berylune.

The little cardboard circus came from Tiger and was a last minute purchase which I think just completed the table, and for just £3! The long candle was also from Tiger.

I bought the gold '1' balloon from the party shop, Partica, in Kingston and my mum and I made a LOT of paper chains!

As for little Ruby herself, I wanted to her to have a special birthday outfit but without making her look like a clown - literally! :) So this is how she looked on the day... a classy circus baby!

I got the skirt in Mothercare - it is from the Baby K range by Myleene Klass. I had to order the black vest on Amazon - it is surprisingly hard to find a black baby vest! The hairband was from H&M Kids, and my mum and I made the bow tie! I got the fabric from M is for Make, and we put a little wadding inside to give it some structure. We covered some elastic in the pink fabric to go round her neck. It was fastened with velcro, so unsurprisingly she pulled it off half way through the party!

We had such a lovely day, although I think Ruby found it a tad overwhelming! Bless her! Today is her actual birthday, but we will have a quieter day with her grandparents. Happy birthday my precious little gemstone xxx

Something different: Natal Hypnotherapy

July 1, 2015

I'm going off piste a little here today. I don't like to talk too much about kids and parenting on here as that's not what my blog is about, but sometimes when something means a lot to you, you want to share it. My blog is my little corner of the internet, So I thought, for this one post, I would use it to talk about something which turned out to be really important for me.

The reason for writing this post now, is that in less than two weeks, Ruby will turn one! I can't quite believe it. In the run up to her birthday, I've been reflecting a little bit on the past 12 months, but also on where I was at exactly this time last year - huge, uncomfortable, and fast approaching one of the biggest events in my life!

When I was pregnant, like many women, I was quite anxious about the idea of giving birth, and even mentioned it to my doctor. She suggested a course of CBT to relieve any anxieties, but when I did a little research online I came across Natal Hypnotherapy. I was initially a little skeptical, but what I read online convinced me to give it a go, and I started off by purchasing the book - Effective Birth Preparation. I ended up reading the book about 3 times during my pregnancy, as I really wanted to retain the information. After the first read, I was already starting to feel much more relaxed about the whole idea, as it dispels a lot of myths about childbirth, and explains so much about how a hospital environment can actually make it more difficult to give birth, and that the main thing is trying to keep your body relaxed throughout.

My first decision from this was opting to have my baby at the midwife-led unit at my local hospital, and ideally I wanted a water birth. The unit was right next to the labour ward so this made me feel happy that if anything did happen it was easy to transfer.

Next, I purchased a couple of the Natal Hypnotherapy downloads to listen to on my iPod; Effective Birth Preparation and The Labour Companion. I started listening to the first one a few days a week, from about 25 weeks. It is basically calming words and music, that talks a lot about how natural giving birth is and how to stay relaxed. Occassionally I would nod off before the end, but that is ok apparatenly, it just means you are really relaxed. I did always wonder whether I would be able to relax in the same way while having real life contractions, but I made sure to stay positive, and as the program suggests, tried to rid myself of any worries that entered my head.

The closer I got to the 'big day' I listened to the downloads more and more, and in the last few weeks I was listening to them at least once a day. If anything, it was a really great way to stay relaxed in those weeks of waiting for baby to arrive. I honestly shocked myself when I heard myself telling friends that I was actually looking forward to giving birth!

On the 13th July (3 days after my due date), I started to 'feel' something. I'd had lots of Braxton Hicks already, but this definitely felt different, although still not particularly strong. I used the breathing techniques every time I felt a wave, and we actually went to the supermarket, then came home and made our imminent baby her first birthday cake!

In the early hours of the 14th July, I woke up and felt something 'pop'. it wasn't my waters breaking, but I knew things were definitely starting to happen. I got up and went in the living room, and put on my hypnotherapy tracks, and lay down and relaxed. At around 3am, I decided to phone the hospital, and they told me to come in. I got my other half up, and off we set to the hospital. I continued to listen to my iPod in the car, and luckily as it was the middle of the night there was no traffic whatsoever.

I won't run through my entire birth story, but basically we spent the first few hours in the midwife-led unit, with two lovely midwifes, who were really supportive of my birth plan, and were really interested in the hypnotherapy techniques. In fact, it really shocks me that midwifes are not given any training in this area, despite the fact that they were so amazed at how much it was helping me.

My birth plan started to change when the midwifes suggested breaking my waters. When this happened it was then necessary for me to be transferred to the labour ward, as meconium in my waters meant the baby could be in danger. While I was disappointed, as I could no longer have the water birth I'd hoped for, I of course wanted to make sure our baby was delivered safely. I was later given an injection to move things along, and it was at this point (about 7cm dilated) I started to feel the need for more pain relief, and started on the gas and air. Until this point I'd only been using the hypnotherapy techniques and a tens machine.

It was a difficult delivery, followed by me being taken to surgery to remove the placenta, I lost a lot of blood, and ended up having blood transfusions and we were in hospital for a week. (also due to Ruby being on antibiotics too) Despite all this, I don't feel worried about having another baby, and I put this down to the hypnotherapy. Yes, the delivery was tough, but the techniques I learnt helped me through the labour part, keeping me calm and able to deal without pain relief. I'm not going to lie at one point, I did tell my hubby I wanted an epidural, but he reminded me that this was the 'self doubt' phase - the part where the baby is very nearly here, and things are intense, and you are doubting if you can do it or not. It's essential to have your other half onboard too by the way!

Looking back, I am really proud of how I managed it all, considering how anxious I originally was. I just wanted to share this experience with you, as I know there may be others out there, pregnant and similarly worried, and I would highly recommend giving it a go. Let's face it, you've got nothing to lose - that baby is coming either way, so why not at least attempt managing the journey in a more relaxed way?!

I'd love to hear if you've used Natal Hypnotherapy too and what you thought. And if anyone has any questions, just let me know! ;)

xxx

Ruby's first pancake day

February 15, 2015

When you have a child, even the most minor of events seem so much more exciting don't they? Especially when it's their first experience of it! So last week when Debenhams asked me if I'd like to share a post on making pancakes with Ruby I thought it seemed like one of those traditions that you have to pass down to your kids - eating only pancakes for dinner one day a year! Even though at Ruby's age (she was 7 months yesterday!) she doesn't really understand what's going on, it's still fun for us to see how she reacts and interacts with new things.

It all started off quite civilised as she watched from her Bumbo, but soon she wanted to get involved! She's at the stage where her little hands grab for everything, so a few times we nearly ended up with flour everywhere!

Before we started making the mixture, she *somehow* ended up in my huge Tala bowl! Much hilarity! She's such a little wriggler that it was really hard to get any photos of her that aren't blurry! She was loving banging the utensils off the worktop and trying to fit an entire lemon in her mouth!

By the time we got to actually making the pancakes, she was a tad restless so retired to her bouncer chair, but she did seem to enjoy eating the pancakes at the end! Obviously she won't remember her first pancake day, but it definitely made a small tradition like this much more fun for us! And hey, she can always look back on mum's blog in years to come to reminisce! :)

Thanks to Debenhams for supplying some of the items for our pancake day fun! Tala Mixing Bowl, pink whisk and spatula, Greenpan frying pan and Royal Doulton dinner plates . And for Ruby's super cute outfit! Vest, striped cardi, skinny jeans, hairband and socks.